Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
