So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
