Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
