I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize