i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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