Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
