i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
