Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I think I just shit out all my problems.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
