I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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