it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize