I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
