so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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