We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
