we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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