I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
