operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
