covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Randomize
