I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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