just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
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