I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize