My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Randomize
