they need to just BURY HIM!
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
