I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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