Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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