Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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