New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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