She said her name was "party"
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
