When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
