I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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