so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
