I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
