i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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