I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
