I heard we made out
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
operation harelip BJ is a go
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Randomize
