We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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