Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
