And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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