We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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