someone threw a dead crab at me
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
