But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
