i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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