where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
