i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
