i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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