But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
