Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
