do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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