hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
pop tarts are not kleenex
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
