how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Text me some of your sweat
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