i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
