Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
